NLP Answers

August 31, 2007 § Leave a comment

Having Looked through this blog you may find that you have some questions that you would like answered. How can NLP help you in your daily life? Well it doesn’t need to be the big things, NLP is great for the little things. Actually, particularly the little things because its these everyday patterns of behaviour that have been there for years and which go un-noticed that can cause the most trouble.

 So go for it! Hit me with anything. I look forward to your posts.

 Or for more Information about what  NLP  is go to www.mindschange.com

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Comfort Eating

August 29, 2007 § Leave a comment

NLP and Comfort Eating in Glasgow.

 

Why do people comfort eat? Well, to get a handle on that, you need to understand a bit about the unconscious mind.  Your conscious mind can handle about seven plus or minus two bits of information at any one time. Think how many digits of a phone number you can remember when someone shouts them out and at what point your brain just gives up and they all merge into one.

 

In NLP or Neuro Linguistic Programming we say that the unconscious mind on the other hand is dealing with so much more which includes everything coming at you from your senses, your breathing, blinking, moving your muscles and the rest. The figures vary between 4 to 11 million bits of information at any one time. To think we are conscious beings is to be very wide of the mark. The psychology establishment  are now coming round to the idea that we are mostly unconscious beings who work on instinct and react to the world around them in similar ways to other animals.

 

So the analogy which is often used is that the conscious mind is like the captain of a ship and the unconscious mind is like the crew. Imagine that the crew are seven years old  and we are getting even closer.  Now each member of the crew and each part of your unconscious mind has your best interests at heart.  So if its given a job it will do it to the best of its ability.  Say for instance as a child, when something bad happened a parent would cheer you up by giving you some chocolate.  If this happened a number of times, a part of you would associate cheering up with chocolate. As you grew up and things went wrong that part would step right up and offer its solution. The more often this happened the more anchored that would become to that idea.

 

Now if you go through a period of unhappiness then that part  would be constantly there offering food as a comfort i.e. you would comfort eat.. What its not very good at is seeing  the bigger picture which is that comfort eating and getting fatter is another source of unhappiness. If you are not being comforted in your life and it provides however fleeting a feeling of comfort, then its going to be difficult to persuade that part to stop what its doing. To stop it from comfort eating.

 

So what do you do? Well firstly you need to change your thinking. Look at your life and pay special attention to the areas where you are being comforted. If you are unhappy, the chances are that your internal filters are set to ignore the good parts of your life and see only the negative. You need to change that behaviour. Negative thoughts should be banned from your thinking. The minute they come at you actively think of something you enjoy or are grateful for. Really take charge of your thoughts. It requires discipline at first but gets easier and conditioned with time. Think about the things which do comfort you and concentrate on them. Make them bigger and brighter. Talk to yourself as you would to a seven year old child who you wanted to motivate. Get them to focus on anything good which happens. This will change your brain chemistry to produce more ‘happy’ chemicals and you will start to feel better. Its similar to getting fit; going to the gym can be difficult to start but if you keep going you start to see the benefits and it becomes a habit.  Take charge of your thinking and it too becomes habitual.

 

Once you prove to the part which provides comfort in the form of food that actually you are comforted in so many other ways that it is a bit redundant, you can more easily persuade it to stop what it does – to stop you comfort eating.

 

Try it for two weeks and see what happens. Tell your unconscious mind that you’re not doing negative thoughts for a fortnight and that if it wants it can start it up again then. The chances are that when it sees how much better you feel, it won’t bother.

 

 

 For more information about NLP visit www.mindschange.com/about.htm

Weight Loss

August 25, 2007 § Leave a comment

Weight Loss.

What makes people who are generally successful , who manage their business and personal lives with aplomb, who happily navigate the complexities of the world we live in which would have thrown our grandparents… what makes them make bad decisions about food?  Why can’t they loose weight when they can do so many other things effectively. Strategies can be one of the answers.

I was recently asked to go canyoning. ‘It will be fantastic’ my friends said. ‘you have to something exciting at least once a year’ they said. Now a few years ago, I would have said yes with no hesitation. Try everything at least once was my motto. So what was going on in my unconscious mind then for that to happen? Well, I would visualise the smiling faces of my friends, then I would have a feeling of excitement and camaraderie. Then I would talk to myself and say ‘ it will be such a laugh, lets do it!’ and I would sign up there and then.

We have five senses : visual, auditory, kinaesthetic ( or feeling ) , gustatory (taste) and  olfactory (smell) or V,A,K,G,O. In the above example my strategy was V followed by K followed by A.

This time round I said no to the canyoning. So what happened there? Well I saw a picture of us diving into freezing cold water, followed by a kinaesthetic feeling of ‘Noooooo!’ followed by a voice saying ‘why would you want to put yourself through that? Followed by another feeling of ‘No’.

Can you see the difference between those two strategies? The young person in the first example didn’t run the visual movie of the consequences whereas the older person in the second example did.

Now in my experience, people who eat too much, who are not loosing weight,  are running the first strategy or something similar. Whatever strategy they are running, its different from the strategy they run to make ‘good decisions’ in their lives. So one example would be someone who is normally very visual; when making decisions they run the movie in their minds eye and can see the consequences of the decision.They will then have a feeling of whether it’s a good decision or a bad one. When they analyse the bad decisions about eating cake they find that they had a feeling that they wanted it, but didn’t run the movie or the visuals of the consequences. Its like the picture was static, they could only see the cake and have the feeling of wanting to eat it.

People who make good decisions about food and who don’t experience weight gain get to feel bad, before they eat. People who make bad decisions about food  and don’t experience weight loss feel bad after they’ve eaten and that’s the difference.

So a suggestion would be if you want to loose weight, don’t have a static picture. Run the movie of the consequences of eating the cake and exaggerate it. Up the calories by 1000%. See a picture of your waistline growing by 10 inches. Make whatever pictures you need to in your mind that will help you to make the right choice.

So look at the good decisions you make in the parts of your life which are successful, discover your strategy and map it across to your eating life.  Rather than take a diet pill, change your strategy.

This may be the only thing you need to do or it may be part of the answer. There are a number of techniques NLP can use to help you loose weight now.

Minds Change provides one-to-one coaching and training and is based in Glasgow Scotland

Dorothy C. Le Grove is a Master practitioner of NLP

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Feeling Down

August 24, 2007 § Leave a comment

   In my opinion unhelpful patterns of thinking can contribute to someone less than happy in the abscence of any significant negative events. By changing them I believe you can start to take control of the ‘happy chemicals’ flowing through your system.

So, what’s your strategy for feeling good or bad? Let me give you an example of what I mean.  A client I was seeing recently was feeling very down. One aspect of this was her inability to tackle any of the jobs she had to do, like weeding the garden or clean out the cupboards. She had even lost the will to sit down and paint pictures which was her favourite hobby. Ever time she thought of doing a task she would become despondent and loose all energy, become overwhelmingly tired and often she would take to her bed. Sometimes she couldn’t bring herself to get out of bed in the morning.

 So we sat down together and really picked apart what her strategy was. We started with the weeding and concentrated on the thought ‘I should do some weeding’ and the point where she became overcome with fatigue and decided to do something else or nothing. That period of time was about a half a second. So what was going on?

 Well the thought would come into her head ‘lets do some weeding’. Then she would see a picture of the garden looking lovely and weed free. So far so good…. Then a voice inside would say ‘but it would takes hours and hours of work to make it look that good’. Then she would feel that she didn’t have enough energy to do the whole garden so what was the point in even starting. Then she would think of  another job and the same process would kick off, and another job… then a wave of tiredness, then bed. 

So we changed her strategy so that when she thought of a job, she would make pictures of a small piece of it completed. I also explained that the unconscious mind is like a bunch of seven year olds (topic for another blog) and if you wanted to get them to do anything, why not speak to them like she speaks to her kids. Imagine saying to kids ‘right , I want you to help me with the weeding, you will be there for hours, and it may not make that big an impact. You will feel sore after it… go to it.’ What do you think would happen? Motivated … not! Try this – ‘ kids, we are going out to the fresh air to play in the sun. I want you to weed that little bit over there and make  it  look really lovely and as a reward I’m going to let you do something that you really love’. Or something like that.  

In addition to this she created a metaphor which was the seashore with a bright iridescent sea into which she threw waterproof boxes containing each task. The boxes had ribbons on top and floated on the water. Whenever she needed to do a task she would pull one of the boxes out of the water and open it. This stopped her from being overwhelmed by all the tasks. It also meant that when she thought about a task she would automatically go to her ‘happy place’ where she felt calm. 

NLP is about making  really basic changes to the way we think and installing new strategies and patterns of behaviours which leave us in a much more resourceful state. 

 Minds Change provides one-to-one coaching and training courses and is based in Glasgow, Scotland.

For more information about NLP visit  http://www.mindschange.com 

Panic Attacks

August 7, 2007 § Leave a comment

What is the purpose of a panic attack? In my opinion and in my experience it is the unconscious mind using a sledgehammer to get your conscious minds attention. My guess is that  its tried other methods like a pit of the stomach feeling or nausea, but these efforts have been ignored or misunderstood.  I had a client who was having panic attacks and he had no clue why. I used a simple NLP technique called ‘parts integration’ to start a dialogue with his unconscious mind. We brought  the part which was causing the panic attacks out  onto his hand and asked it for what purpose it was producing these unwanted feelings. Within seconds he had his answer – he needed to postpone his wedding for six months. It was that simple. There were so many things going on in his work and professional life that the wedding on top of it all was sending him into stress overload. He was so caught up in his life and had been under stress for so long that he thought he was coping – but he wasn’t and his unconscious mind was trying to tell him that he was near to breaking point.  The result was that he rearranged the wedding, the family were very supportive and the panic attacks stopped immediately.  NLP is very simple. It uses simple techniques but don’t let that fool you because they are exceptionally powerful. If you are having panic attacks, there is probably a very good reason for it and you need to address it as soon as possible because to my mind you are nearing breaking point and you need help to find out what’s going on for you. Sit down with a trained practitioner and let them help you to get in touch with your unconscious mind. It may be some simple bit of wood that you cant see for the trees. NLP in Glasgow Scotland – www.mindschange.com

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Fear of Failure

August 3, 2007 § Leave a comment

The fear of failure – good thing or a bad thing? Yes and no. Think about it, you have an exam to sit and you need to study. Very few people actually enjoy studying but the fear of failure miraculously allows us to find the resources we need to sit at a desk for hours cramming. The same holds for writing reports, training for a sport and so on.  However, the fear of failure crosses the threshold on to the bad side when it starts to hold us back from the things we should be doing –  taking a chance in our career, sitting down to write or paint, phoning someone we haven’t spoken to for years. Studies have shown that we are much more likely to take a chance and gamble in order not to loose what we already have than gamble in order to get something we don’t have. Now that leads to a very static life likely to get caught in an eddy. People don’t realise how stuck they are.

Where does this fear of failure come from? Well the interesting thing is, as in evolutionary design, the mind doesn’t create new fear for every new situation, it builds on previous fear. You can usually trace fear back through your timeline to a very young age. So you first feel fear, great, it produced the desired response and you got a result , whatever that may have been, you ran away or attracted your mothers attention. The next time you are in a tricky situation you know where to get that fear feeling again. And this continues for the rest of your life growing an intricate and powerful fear response. And a lot of the time the fear is completely disproportionate for the situation … say in an interview where the adrenelin produced is sufficient to get you out of a tiger chasing senario but certainly not helpful in a situation where you need to think clearly and appear relaxed…. I don’t think so!

However, help is at hand. NLP can break the neurological connections to that old fear allowing you to create a new and more appropriate fear for the adult you now are. It wont stop your ability to feel fear, it just means that you are no longer tapping into the deep, pit of the stomach fear that is completely inappropriate and is holding you back mightily.

Do not let the fear of failure hold you back any longer … it can so easily be got rid of, its just a waste of your time and time is precious in this life.  Think  about what it will be like in the future, now, when you are doing the thing you were meant to do , as you look back on the way it used to be as  you think about it , now.

Dorothy C. Le Grove is an NLP Master Practitioner. she lives in Glasgow Scotland.

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Addiction

August 1, 2007 § Leave a comment

Its a great pity that nlp in Glasgow hasn’t yet taken off. In the addiction capital of the uk it is needed more than ever.  If someone is really ready to change and wants desperately to give up smoking, drinking, eating chocolate, whatever it is, then nlp can make it so easy.   I once got a client off chocolate in 3 minutes… and almost a year later he still hasn’t gone back to it.

People develop addictions as patterns of behaviour; they become lodged in our neurology.  NLP can re-pattern, reprogramme your mind to take you back to a point before you first took the substance so that you would have to learn to be addicted all over again …which I’m guessing you probably wouldn’t want to do. Right?

If you want to give something up, and willpower isn’t enough … try NLP, it really works!

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